Chapter 3 began with how Randy and Jai found out that Randy had cancer, and exactly how serious his condition was. He discovered in 2006 that he had cancer and quickly learned as much as he possibly could about it. The doctors were initially optimistic thinking that he could be saved. After performing the "Whipple Treatment" they thought they were successful. However, in August of 2007, Randy came out of remission. Here, we really got to see what kind of man Randy was because shortly after counting his own tumors, all he could think about was why there weren't any tissues in the room. Then, a short while after receiving the news, a coworker saw Randy driving his convertible and was shocked to see how happy Randy seemed. Randy knew that moping and feeling sorry for himself would get him no where, he needed to really live what time he had left; not squander it with "what if"s.
Randy then, in an effort to make himself seem less a saint, went on to describe his less meritorious days back in college. Apparently, he can be arrogant and is quite capable of offending anyone he meets. He was comfortable in this fact until Andy van Dam, a professor from college, pointed it out to him in the nicest yet most cutting words Randy had ever experienced.
Next we discover that Randy's neice and nephew speant a lot of time with him as children. They went on trips and did other fun things together. But the major memory Randy chose to share was when he took the kids out in his new red convertible. His sister (their mother) made it very clear to them that they had to be careful not to make a mess in his new car. To teach the children a lesson and make them feel more comfortable about getting in the car, Randy proceeded to dump soda all over his back seat. He wanted the kids to know that people come before possessions. This turned out to be a good thing, because his nephew did not feel as terrible when he threw up in the back seat.
Upon discovering his condition, and realizing that this meant he would not be there to raise his children, Randy asked his neice and nephew who are now adults, to take them out from time to time. He wanted them to spend the kind of time with his children that he speant with them; and to allow some accidents because afterall, they were children too once.
Then came his biggest brick wall ever; Jai. In his younger years, Randy was a very content bachelor and wound up getting himself a reputation for being a bit of a player. Then he traveled to the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill to give a lecture on virtual reality technology. There he met Jai who was to be his host while at the college. He immediately liked her. Jai turned out to be as skittish as a colt; having just left one relationship she was not enthusiastic about taking more chances.
But, Randy won. After seeing each other for a little while and getting her to move to Pittsburgh (a true challenge) they wound up getting married. Their wedding was an event of course. After the ceremony, they departed in an air balloon and wound up nearly getting hit by a train when they landed.
Apparently, Jai had a thing for being tumultuous, because early in their marriage, she accidentally backed into Randy's car while he was at work. She was so worried that he would be upset that she arranged the perfect evening to come home to, and then broke it to him. To her surprise, he was not angry. He looked at the damage, they decided both cars would still run, and Randy declined the idea of fixing the dents. If the cars weren't broken, why fix them? Not everything has to be shiny and new. For a short time, Jai didn't understand this. But later, the dented cars came to be a symbol of that to them.
Here, I was reminded of life with my fiance. Travis finds it amazing, since we've been together, a wide variety of things household related items have wound up breaking, and he's learned that I am quite accident prone. The list of broken items includes two doors (I swear,the first one was not my fault, it fell on me! I did not break this one!), a window (that one was my fault), a shower rod, and a handheld mixer as well as several pans. My accidents on the first day of visiting him alone include getting a bloody nose within 10 minutes of arriving, being stung in the shoulder by a wasp, and being bitten between my toes by a fire ant. This was all in the same 45 minute period. And last night, he learned that I can twist my ankle stepping down no more than 10 inches (I fell, made lots of noise, and blushed like you wouldn't believe). But somehow knowing I'm not the only one makes me feel better.
Then came New Years, and with it the birth of their first son. Jai went into labor, but there were complications that put both she and the baby in danger; and she had to have an emergency c-section. Dylan was born pissed off; a very good sign. He stayed in ICU, and was later released to go home. They learned that keeping your head, even when you want to break down, can be the difference between a good turnout and a disaster.
This reminded me of my youngest brother, Robert (Bear for short, thank you.) Bear and Marian (his twin, my youngest sister) were born November 26th, 2000. While in the birth hospital, both were given formula that was on recall and Bear wound up with a bad infection. Robert was home for only a day or two before he was being airlifted to Buffalo with a high fever and the beginning of what has been a nightmare for the family. The fever was inducing seizures. Unfortunately, they were not diagnosed for almost a year. I can not begin to describe for you the horror of his screams after an attack. No child should ever have to make those sounds. My mother figured out what they were, and even what his diagnosis was, on her own. Unfortunately, none of the doctors would listen to her, and it cost my brother dearly. It took a seizure in the office of his pediatrician during one of his routine checkups to get the doctors to listen. My brother had Wests Syndrome. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/West_syndrome Due to how late he was diagnosed and a relapse when he was around 2 years old, the seizures did a considerable amount of damage. He and Marian are 8 now. Marian is in third grade, and the most bright, talkative, energetic child you will ever meet. Last year, she was awarded a medal in school for passing her elder sister Marcia's high score for how many books she had read. Bear on the otherhand, made a rather large acheivement himself. For my father's birthday, he stood on his own and took two steps unsupported. It's the first time any of us have seen him walk without assistance. We're still working on getting him to take normal food again, but the feeding tubes from the hospital made it so bottles are the only thing he's comfortable with. He communicates without words, and spends a lot of time in a tripod position. The contrast between them tore my mother to pieces, but she still held strong and tried to get her child the care he needed. Were it not for her and her ability to keep her head, who knows what Bear would be like now.
While at his mother's home going through his father's things shortly after he passed, Randy made a discovery. His father had been awarded a the bronze star in WWII for valor. Randy asked his mother why he didn't know about this, and she replied that she didn't know about it. Throughout their marriage, it had never come up. Randy learned that humility was a virtue, and his father had it in excess.
The final lesson of this chapter was that Randy learned that his diagnosis had in fact, enriched their year. If he hadn't been diagnosed with cancer, they wouldn't have done half the things or had half the fun they did. Always keep things in a bright light.
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